Think Positive!

I heard this great report on NPR last week, and while I was listening I said to myself “I’m going to blog about this” and then of course it slipped my mind and here I am a week later, the details a little fuzzy, but here’s the gist of it. (Maybe someone else heard it too and can fill in some more details?)

There’s a company in Germany that had a serious problem with low morale and also with employee turn-over rates. People at the company were always pissing and moaning about things – work, each other, their families, the weather, etc., and as negativity is apt to do, it infected the entire operation. The owner of the company, recognizing the contagious condition of negativity, wrote a new policy in the Employee Manual that stated that there would be absolutely no negativity accepted on company grounds regardless of whether it related to business or not. The only condition under which someone could complain was if the complaint was a lead-in to a proposed solution to improve that situation. Interviewees were thoroughly informed of this policy and scrutinized on their level of negativity. Unnecessary complaining on the job was grounds for immediate dismissal (which they only ended up having to enforce on a couple of people, who they felt in the end, they were better off without anyway).

As it turned out, most all of the employees were very pleased to have this policy initiated, because, although they were all, no doubt, guilty of spreading negativity themselves, they recognized that it was creating an unpleasant work environment. Within weeks the place turned around – employees were pleasant, they were in better moods, they were more productive, and in the end, they stayed at their jobs longer. Not only did this turn out to be an improvement for the company, but also for the employees. Several of the employees were interviewed and said that the new positive attitude had flowed over into their personal lives and they found that they were much happier people in general.

What a great policy! We should all enforce that discipline on ourselves. Of course, we all need a time and place (and person on whom to) vent our frustrations (isn’t that what blogs are for?). But really, if we could just start with one environment and say “I am not going to be negative here” that would train us to begin to think about how often we are negative and the effect that it has on us and the people around us.

Think about it – what good does complaining do? Here it is in a nutshell – if you don’t like a situation, change the situation; if you do not have the power/control to change it, then accept it or get out of the situation. But don’t complain AND accept it – that’s just pathetic!

Moondust

When I die, I wanna' be a Luna fairy.

check out David Delamare's work

Metamorphosis

I feel like I’m at a turning point, where I can become a different me. There’s this other person that lives inside of me. I recognize her; I’ve known her for a long time. She is the me I’ve always wanted to be, but I could never shed this skin I hide her in. I think it’s time.

I wonder how a caterpillar feels just before she turns into a butterfly?

I’ve been to this turning point before, but never this close. I’ve been too scared to let it happen. I could see it, and I wanted it, but always retreated to the safety of my cocoon; afraid to live my life after so many years of watching it like a movie on a screen. But the cocoon has become uncomfortable – my wings don’t fit any more.

I wonder how it feels to fly?

Why is my Body Smarter than my Brain?

The human body is an amazing machine when you consider what it has to work with (our brains, for one, are not a lot of help). I have had this body for 43 years now and I know less about how it works then I do my car, which I’ve only had for 2 years. I have an owner's manual for my car, which I have actual perused from time to time – usually when a warning light comes on or it's time for a tune-up. In one way or another, I have warning signals going off in my body all the time, but I seldom take myself in for a tune-up until I reach the break-down point. I feel guilty when I fill up my car’s gas tank with “regular” instead of “high test.” But what about the junk I put in my body? – the worse it is for me, the more I like it. What’s up with that?!

I’m reading this really great book that I borrowed from my sister (you know my sister – the attractive, slender, fit woman I am often seen with). The book is “BodyFueling” by Robyn Landis – it’s an old book, the pages are literally falling out of it, and it was not a new concept when she wrote it. Basically it explains what our bodies do with what we put in them – carbohydrates, proteins, fats, etc. It pretty much is an owner’s manual for our bodies. What is astounding to me is that this knowledge has existed for decades (probably longer than that) and yet every “diet plan” written is pretty much about eating less food, or completely convoluting the natural balance of food. As it turns out, the majority of popular “diet plans” actually promote the storage of fat in our bodies. I’m not going to babble on about the book – if you’re interested, buy it – my point is that this knowledge has been around forever but our culture is so far in denial about solving our fitness/health problems that we would rather buy into all these bogus quick-fixes that never work in the long run than educate ourselves about our own bodies.

And as long as I’m on the topic of how stupid my brain is when it comes to my body – what exactly do I think I’m doing to myself with all this alcohol? Am I trying to preserve/pickle myself? – that is the only explanation I can come up with. Oh, no – I’m drinking to have “fun,” right? So much fun that the next day I feel as though I was run over by a truck (or wish I had been instead)! Yeah - that sounds like fun, ah?

Some people develop diseases or have accidents that harm their bodies irreversibly, and it is a tragedy. Here I am with a perfectly good body, and I am treating it like it has a salvage title! This is the only body I get. I have to live in this body my entire life. I might as well have a little respect for myself and make it a place I want to be. Wish me luck (or better yet – brains!)

Life Signs

Life should come with such road signs!

Mystery Sparks

I was out at an appointment late this afternoon and since I knew I had nothing at home for dinner, I decided to take a little detour on my way home to an upscale grocery store where I know they sell fresh sushi. It’s a detour I take from time to time, because I love sushi and since I live in a small rural town, I have to go seek it out (a fishing expedition, so to speak). So I grab my sushi sampler platter and head to the check-out. While waiting for the cashier to finish, the gentleman in front of me looks at my sushi selection and says “Wow, that looks good.” A polite exchange ensues: “I hope so, its dinner.” “Hmm, I went with Mexican tonight.” “That sounds good too.” The cashier hands him his change and he picks up his bag, “Well, enjoy your dinner.” “thanks, you too.” (SPARK!)

What was that? How can you exchange a few lines with a stranger in the grocery store and get a spark?! I couldn’t even tell you what the guy looked like because I didn’t exactly look at him. It wasn’t a physical attraction anyway – I think it was something in his voice – it was sort of soft and deep and very kind. I can’t explain it, but it made me wish we had more time to chat. (Why? Where was that going to go – “hey baby lets mix my Mexican with your sushi and we’ll make some great Ceviche?” NOT!) In fact if he had hit on me in any way that would have ruined it (but he didn’t seem like the type – he was just being friendly). But I left the store thinking, hmm, I’d like to have a coffee with that guy and get to know him better. Why? What’s up with this?

I don’t know, but I’ve experienced it before, not often, but once in a while. And it’s usually an exchange just like that, where I’m never going to see the guy again and it’s a minute exchange. It always makes me wonder where that spark comes from; what chemistry between two complete strangers in a matter of moments could possibly exist. And if I felt it, did he too? Probably not; and it doesn’t matter; I’ll never know. And as long as I never know, he can remain this perfect guy with a great voice. . . . The one that got away!

It’s enough to send me back for another fishing expedition.

Take Me or Leave Me -- I don't really care!

This is how it started – last night I was IMing with a blogger-friend who suggested that my blog profile was a bit “off-putting” and maybe I should consider changing it (actually he might not have SAID “change it,” but obviously it was what he meant!) My response to him was – “exactly – so am I (off-putting) – that’s the point.” You see, I used to have this little blurb in my profile which then showed at the top under my blog name saying something to the effect of “if you know me, I don’t have to tell you about me, and if you don’t know me why should I give a rat’s-ass to tell you” only it was nicer then that (I left out the rat’s ass). It wasn’t SUPPOSED to be friendly! Although I am a fairly friendly person (when I want to be!), I also am the quintessential smartass. So I really liked that profile statement – it was ME!. Also, I had not filled out ANY of the bullshit profile questions about my specifics (because what does that have to do with anything?! This is not a dating website!)

But, it was sort of bugging me that someone might visit my blog, look at my profile and say “what a bitch, I’m outa’ here!” (because, despite my current mood, I AM a sensitive person). So, I changed it and answered all the bullshit profile questions, so that a visitor to my blog could now view my profile and find out my sex (since this was not a yes or no question, I don’t see it as significant); my age (what bearing does this have on anything?); my astrological sign (figure it out for yourself if you’re so damn psychic!); my zodiac animal (what the #%&* is this?!); my occupation (just ask for my income if that’s what you want to know!); and roughly where I live (why? are you gonna’ stop in for a nightcap?) And then I had to write some little ditty about myself and make it sound nice. I tried 5 times until I finally came up with a statement that said that I am pretty average (except really opinionated) – what a bore! I’d rather be a bitch than a bore!

And you know what? – if you actually SAW that profile – you are probably the only one, because as soon as I get done venting here, I am going to change it back! I honestly don’t care if you think I’m a bitch, ‘cause you know what?! Sometimes I AM! and if you don’t like it, click “back” and leave! Like I said originally (and probably will again!) if you know me, I don’t have to tell you, if you don’t – I don’t give a rip! Figure it out for yourself! Stay? Go? it really doesn’t matter to me!

This is not a dating web-site – and even if it were – don’t judge me by a bunch of statistics and some canned description I feed you – read what I have to say – if you like it, come back, if you don’t, I don’t care – my blog is not about YOU, it’s about ME.

(I'm glad we had this little chat - I'm feeling much better now! Thanks.)

Inner Thoughts of Self Doubt Go for a Spin

So, I’m on my computer tonight, and I can see that my boss is on line too, and he IMs me (can IM be a verb?) with a little a bit of polite chit chat (we haven’t spoken for a couple weeks) and then he asks “what’s your week look like next week?” (It’s about time for reviews – I’m thinkin’ he wants to schedule mine.) I tell him “not bad, a few tentative meetings, but nothing firm – what’s up?” “Well, I’m still waiting on travel authorization (tight budget) but I was hoping you could fly down to Dallas next week for a couple of days to attend a corporate meeting, I can’t make it.” Did you hear that?! My boss wants ME to go to a meeting with about 25 or so of mostly HIS counter-parts from all over the country and represent our Region!

So of course my initial reaction is “Holy Shit! I can’t do that – I’m not qualified!” (I have these thoughts often, and luckily I’m not stupid enough to say them out loud to my boss – that’s what my blog and my sister are for!) What comes out of my mouth (or in this case, my fingers) is “Sure, I can plan on that, do you have some information you can forward to me on it?” And then I hear myself saying (typing) this to my boss and I say (to myself) “What, are you joking! You can’t pull this off!” But now my conversation with the boss-man is over – I’m committed. (“I oughta’ be committed is right!”)

Then I realize that (assuming the travel expense is approved) this is going to happen – he asked me and I said yes. Well, of course I said yes! You don’t tell your boss, “gee thanks for the vote of confidence, but I don’t think I can handle it.” And this starts me thinking – my boss is a very smart man; he’s worked with me for a couple years now; he has confidence in me that I can handle this; and I respect his opinion on just about everything. So I try this spin for a while; it starts to feel less suffocating. “So how’s this going to turn out?”

Here’s how: I’m going to research what I need to in the next week; I’m going to go to the meeting; I’m going to take lots of notes; I’m going to find an ally for clarification when I need it; I’m going to speak up when I need to, but only if I know what I’m talking about. In the end I will have done a great job, made some awesome contacts, gotten my name and face "out there," and made my boss proud. It’s why I have the job I do, and it’s why I’m good at it.