Re-discovering My Path

Once upon a time, many years ago, shortly after graduating (more like escaping) high school, I took a couple of photography classes at the local community college – I can’t remember why – guess I just wanted too. That was a great thing for me at the time – I loved the photog classes and it got me geeked about going to school (which I had NEVER been in high school). I decided to matriculate toward a degree in Graphic Arts – not really sure where that would land me, but there would be time to figure that out – I had my whole life in front of me. That was in 1982. Now, here I am in 2008 (quick math: 26 years later), once again starting out on a path in Graphic Arts.

So what happened to me over the past 26 years? Well, first of all, I was not a full time student – I was working secretarial/administrative jobs back then while going to school nights, and I very quickly realized that the companies I worked for along the way would pay for my education IF I would take business (or other job-related) classes. So I took a bunch of really boring business, accounting, computer programming, and business law classes over the next ten or so years. (I also took some time off from life to pursue whimsical, strange, and less-then-wise adventures – won’t go into that here.) The point is, like so much of my life, I followed the path that others laid out for me, without questioning much whether it was what I WANTED to do. It was what others wanted for me (of me). So I went that way.

Don’t get me wrong – no sour grapes – it’s not anyone else’s fault/responsibility that I made the choices that I did. And in retrospect, I did very well for myself – I have gained valuable business experience as well as the respect of many professionals I have worked with and was able to progress along the proverbial ladder. (And also gained some interesting life experience if you count that whimsical, strange, less-then-wise period of my life). But the point is, here I am, 26 years latter, a middle-aged woman, looking at my life and saying “now it’s MY turn.” I have a wonderful partner in life who is completely supportive; I am in a place in life where I am no longer in a “survival” mode, and can make choices that feel more authentic to me.

I consulted a few more-than-middle-aged women friends, to see if they thought I was crazy – after all, by the time I’m done with this course of study I’ll be nearly 50 and competing with a bunch of fresh twenty-somethings! (Is this just a crazy mid-life crises?!) But the feedback I got was very supportive – basically addressing the fact that lots of people (especially woman) at my age take a look at their lives and figure that they’ve done what they “needed to” for one reason or another all their lives, and now they are ready to do what they WANT to do. That pretty well sums it up for me. I have no regrets, really. I made my own choices and took responsibility for them. But now it’s time to make new choices for myself.

So, here I go, signing up for Graphic Design (and Web Design) classes at the local community college and full of wonder about the road in front of me. It’s sorta like being a kid again!